4 Mindful Moves to Bring Back That Loving Feeling (At Work)

Emma (not her real name) used to love her job.  While she did not giddily skip from the parking lot to her cubicle, she used to be content, happy and engaged.  She used to believe she was making a difference for her company and her customers.  For the past few days, however, she’s been dreading Mondays and spontaneously bursting into tears when thinking about work.  She has actually been thinking of quitting the job that once sparked joy.

Like Emma, we’ve all had days when we felt overwhelmed, tired, stressed and about to scream:  “Ayoko na!”  We’ve also had nights when we lay down to sleep with that “good tired” feeling in our bones, pleased with a productive and fulfilling day.   Still, we’ve had periods that were… meh – utterly uninspired and bored.  (See popular article in the New York Times about languishing [Grant, 2021]).

If you are experiencing this mishmash of pleasant, painful and numb feelings at work right now, you are not alone.  Hope springs eternal when we create space for purposeful pausing, perspective, reflection and gratitude.  Here are 4 mindful moves that we can explore to bring back that loving feeling and spark joy again at work.

Mindful Move 1.  Pause and Breathe.

Buddhist author and teacher Pema Chodron (2017) shares the pause practice that helps free us when we’re stuck in repetitive negative thinking.  Pause practice takes merely three conscious breaths when we feel that we are spiraling into confusion and misery. 

“Pause practice can transform each day of your life. If you pause just long enough, you can reconnect with exactly where you are, with the immediacy of your experience,” Chodron writes.

If you can afford to, rest longer by taking an off-day or two, preferably with limited distractions like social media and Netflix.  Making a conscious effort to get out of the daily chaos can offer the vastness and stillness that your body, mind and spirit may need.

Mindful Move 2.  Reframe the Situation.

Reframing has the potential to transform a dire situation because it challenges our interpretation to see other possibilities.  (Czach, 2020)  This technique allows us to respond, rather than react based on our habitual thinking patterns.  This can be done by asking ourselves powerful questions to compel the mind to think of the situation in a different way.

Reframing invites us to decide not based solely on emotions but also on objectivity and perspective.  It may help to have a reframing conversation with a coach or a trusted friend with whom you can ponder your situation.  In the end, while you may not get a definite answer to your dilemma, you may discover solutions that can surprise and enlighten you.

Mindful Move 3.  Reflect and GROW

When we do get the space and time, we can use a well-loved and practical tool called GROW for reflective thinking.  Created by Sir John Whitmore and his associates in the 1980’s as a coaching model, the GROW framework can be useful when reflecting about a situation.

Socrates famously said “an unexamined life is not worth living.”  Taking time for reflection and introspection, especially during difficult times, can be both transformative and liberating.

Mindful Move 4.  Practice Gratitude

Gratitude is an often underrated practice that can profoundly impact our work and life.  Among its many benefits are counteracting toxicity and alleviating depression.  When we are grateful, there is no room for negativity.  Gratitude also brings to the party its other friends such as happiness, joy, gladness and connection.  Here are some suggestions to call in gratitude in a seemingly gloomy scenario:

·         Write down 3 things you are grateful for everyday for 21 days. 

·         Invite a colleague to be your Gratitude Buddy to share your daily list. 

·         Thank the Lord for all the good things in your life every night in prayer.

Mindful Move 5.  Find your Balance

My mentor used to tell me that work is an expression of our soul’s mission.  However, while work provides purpose and livelihood and therefore vital, it need not define us.  Maintaining a healthy balance on how we regard work is key. 

Work is what you do, not who you are.  Aside from a professional, you’re also a parent, daughter, son, brother, sister, friend.

Finally, it may be worth remembering that, in our work, we will have good days, bad days and everything in between.  As in the case of Emma, holding ourselves and our work with gentleness, compassion and awareness may ultimately be the secret in bringing back that loving feeling.